Satiric radio commentary for the 90s from the man who drained Lake Michigan and filled it with hot chocolate!!!

A Martian Wouldn't Say That! (1998 Version)

Stan Freberg here with a few more television executives' actual memos from the book, "A Martian Wouldn't Say That!" Here's a beaut from one network vice-president: "We want you to know this is the best show we've ever cancelled." Be right back. [:60 SPOT BREAK]

Freberg here with a few memos from "A Martian Wouldn't Say That!" compiled by Diane Robison and my friend Leonard Stern. Stern is a gag writer himself who produced such shows as "Get Smart", and once wrote for me. And he's a publisher: Price/Stern/Sloan.

Stern once received from a network vice-president the memo, "Make the rabbi more Jewish." And how 'bout, "This is the best script for 'The Addams Family' we've seen in a year! Attached are the notes for the rewrite."

Here's one of my favorites from a network censor to a gag writer: "To avoid sponsor conflict, please eliminate the line, 'He fell into a vat of face lotion, and softened to death.'"

Stan Freberg here.

Copyright (C)1998, Stan Freberg/Freberg, Ltd. (but not very) Distributed by Dick Brescia Associates and Radio Spirits, Inc.

See also:
A Martian Wouldn't Say That! and
The Martians Have Returned!
in the 1996 Archives.