Satiric radio commentary for the 90s from the man who drained Lake Michigan and filled it with hot chocolate!!!

Foul-Mouthed Fowls

Stan Freberg here. Ever wonder what happens to parrots and other talking birds who have been taught to talk dirty, after they become an embarrassment to their owners? Many of them have ended up in a special foul-mouthed bird zoo. Be right back. [:60 SPOT BREAK]

I confess that I haven't spent too much time wondering where foul-mouthed parrots end up after their owners have had enough, but I just read about a special zoo in Perth, Australia for just such birds.

Hmm. I played Perth once; it's on the eastern coast of Australia. But nobody said, "Stan, you want to visit the dirty bird zoo?" Actually, it's called "The George Zoo," and it's home to about 50 birds who all should get their beaks washed out with soap.

Curator Craig George says many people buy parrots and macaws and teach them to swear a blue streak. "They think it's funny at first," he says, "but eventually the birds become an embarrassment, using filthy language when company or, say, the boss comes to dinner. Then they want to get rid of them, but no other zoo will take them. It isn't the birds' fault, so we take them in."

Hmm. The man is actually providing a kind of halfway house for wayward birds. George says, "When all 50 of them get to talking at the same time, it gets kind of bawdy around here." I can imagine.

Hey, he could put the birds on cable TV! Nobody'd bat an eye.

Stan Freberg here.

Copyright ©1996, Stan Freberg/Freberg, Ltd. (but not very) Distributed by Dick Brescia Associates and Radio Spirits, Inc.