Satiric radio commentary for the 90s from the man who drained Lake Michigan and filled it with hot chocolate!!!

Roswell Revisited

Stan Freberg here. So the government is at it again, eh? Clumsily attempting to pull off still another cover-up. Be right back. [:60 SPOT BREAK]

As if right on cue after my commentary on Roswell, the Pentagon held a press conference.

Col. John Hayes explained to a group of reporters that what people thought were aliens that crashed in Roswell, New Mexico, were actually "...ahem...test dummies. In the 1950s, the Air Force was taking these dummies up, and dropping them to see what would happen...ahem...some of the dummies lost fingers when they fell, which accounted for them having only four fingers, next question!"

Then he held up a report with a picture of an alien on the cover, and over it was stamped "CASE CLOSED." Not likely, Colonel.

When a reporter asked how it was that the dummy drop wasn't until the 50s, and the Roswell incident was back in 1947, the Colonel went glassy-eyed!

The only dummies will be those people who believe "...still one more cover-up!"

Hey! Maybe the COLONEL was an alien!

Stan Freberg here.

Copyright (C)1997, Stan Freberg/Freberg, Ltd. (but not very) Distributed by Dick Brescia Associates and Radio Spirits, Inc.