Satiric radio commentary for the 90s from the man who drained Lake Michigan and filled it with hot chocolate!!!

The Earthquake/Flab Connection?

Stan Freberg here. A story in the "Weekly World News" says that overweight Californians may cause a major earthquake. A seismologist claims Californians have to shed 300 million pounds to avoid it! Hmm. We'll delve into this story when I come back. [:60 SPOT BREAK]

Freberg again. A controversial seismologist has a dire warning for residents of San Fransisco and Los Angeles: "Lose 300 million pounds so, or perish in a major earthquake!" This, from one of the country's widely read news sources, the "Weekly World News."

German earthquake expert Dr. Fritz Weller says many quakes are caused by the pressure of an overweight society on weak places in the earth's crust. "People just don't realize how much strain that extra weight is putting on those fault lines. In San Fransisco and L.A., which are directly over major faults, the average person is 14.8 pounds overweight." Hmm.

"The population of L.A. is about 15 million, and San Fransisco, about 5 million. Add it up, that means 300 million pounds of excess stress on those weak spots." Other siesmologists write Weller's theory off, but he says Guatemala, Chile and Nicaragua, which have suffered major tremors, all have lots of people at least 14.8 pounds overweight and more.

Hey, you don't have to convince me! I can't promise to lose the 14 pounds, but the .8 is definitely coming off!

Stan Freberg here.

Copyright (C)1997, Stan Freberg/Freberg, Ltd. (but not very) Distributed by Dick Brescia Associates and Radio Spirits, Inc.