Satiric radio commentary for the 90s from the man who drained Lake Michigan and filled it with hot chocolate!!!

The Check Is In The...Microwave?

Stan Freberg here. We all know the line, "The check is in the mail," but now comes a variation: "The check is in the microwave?" [:60 SPOT BREAK]

Freberg here. AT&T is having problems that have nothing to do with Sprint. Up to 7000 checks a day have been arriving soaking wet at AT&T's credit card payment facility in Columbus, Georgia, because of heavy storms in this "El Nino" year.

Checks are fed through high-speed equipment to process, but none of this can happen if the checks are sopping wet. They tried hair dryers on the checks - too slow, plus, no doubt, it produced fly-away hair...uh, checks. Then, eureka! Somebody thought of the microwave ovens in the employees' eating area!

Checks took just about the same time as heating a danish; but at lunch and dinner, they have to take out the checks and give the microwaves back to the employees.

Ah, technology, eh?

Stan Freberg here.

Copyright (C)1998, Stan Freberg/Freberg, Ltd. (but not very) Distributed by Dick Brescia Associates and Radio Spirits, Inc.