Satiric radio commentary for the 90s from the man who drained Lake Michigan and filled it with hot chocolate!!!

Tomorrow Is Valentine's Day (Don't Say I Didn't Warn You)!

Stan Freberg here. Well, in case all you out there listening have forgotten, tomorrow is Valentine's Day. I wouldn't kid you about this. That gives you one day to buy a Valentine's card or pick up a box of candy. Skip the chocolate rabbit; try and find a heart-shaped box. More, after this. [:60 SPOT BREAK]

Freberg again. Yes, tomorrow is February 14th, a day for which Hallmark Cards lives! I'm sure that Valentine's Day must have been started by the Hallmark company. Whatever. It's a nice romantic day. A lot of people get married on Valentine's Day. Not such a great idea for a man; if you forget that, buddy, you got two strikes against you: Valentine's Day AND your wedding anniversary!

I'm ahead of the game. I remembered. I already have the heart-shaped box from See's Candy, and just in case she pinches all the chocolates and isn't thrilled by what's inside, I also bought a back-up bag of Rocky Road. I know she loves that.

Which reminds me, Rocky Road ice cream is 100 years old. It was created by the two guys who founded Dreyer's Ice Cream. In those days they didn't have little bitty marshmallows, so they cut big marshmallows into little pieces with their wives' sewing scissors, and added almonds and chocolate ice cream. True story. Later, did their wives say, "Hey, how did my scissors get all sticky?" If they were smart, the Dreyers brothers gave their wives the first Rocky Road ice cream for Valentine's Day.

Don't forget a card, at least, and don't say I didn't give you a day's warning.

Stan Freberg here.

Copyright (C)1997, Stan Freberg/Freberg, Ltd. (but not very) Distributed by Dick Brescia Associates and Radio Spirits, Inc.