Satiric radio commentary for the 90s from the man who drained Lake Michigan and filled it with hot chocolate!!!

Harper's Index®: Chicken Feet, McDonald's, etc., etc.

Stan Freberg here with a few statistics from "Harper's Index®." Rank of chicken feet among Chinese moviegoers' favorite snacks? Number 1. Hmm. Maybe not since the bird flu scare. They'll have to settle for Junior Mints. Be right back. [:60 SPOT BREAK]

Freberg again. Here's a couple of McDonald's statistics. Portion of McDonald's revenue that comes from overseas? 50%! Also, number of wars ever fouhgt between countries that both had at least one McDonald's franchise? 0. Hmm, could "Mickey D's" be the greatest peacemaker of all?

Finally, the number of Planet Hollywood franchises to be opened in the Middle East this year? 2. Yeah, that's just what the Middle East needs, all right. Can you see Arafat saying to Netanyahu, "I meet you at the Beirut Planet Hollywood, okay, 'B.B.'?"

Not likely.

Stan Freberg here.

Copyright ©1998, Stan Freberg/Freberg, Ltd. (but not very) Distributed by Dick Brescia Associates and Radio Spirits, Inc.