Satiric radio commentary for the 90s from the man who drained Lake Michigan and filled it with hot chocolate!!!

Happy Friday the 13th???

Stan Freberg here. In case you hadn't noticed, today is Friday the 13th! I hope you're not superstitious, heh-heh-heh...I'm not...much. Be right back. [:60 SPOT BREAK]

Freberg here. Hope you'll be very careful today. I confess Friday the 13th makes me nervous. 'Course, I never walk under a ladder, or let a black cat cross in front of me on any day, but today? No way.

And while we're at it, I think the Armed Forces should take the day off. No, even if we were in the middle of a war, the Pentagon should just say "Olly-olly oxen free!" for the day. Ah, too risky to fight on Friday the 13th, you know what I mean?

Everybody else just stay in bed, since you never know what may come rolling off the roof...What??? You're already in your car? LOOK OUT FOR THAT GREEN VAN!!! Whew, that was close...

Look, just do the best you can, keep looking behind you, don't run across the kitchen floor in your socks, and stay away from any weird-looking restaurants.

Stan Freberg here.

Copyright ©1998, Stan Freberg/Freberg, Ltd. (but not very) Distributed by Dick Brescia Associates and Radio Spirits, Inc.